It’s just another perfect day in the Vicola House of Shit.

So I get up, after the worst night's sleep in living memory, wash my hair and then discover that the sodding hairdryer won't work. So I use the back up dryer that has all the power of a gnat gently breaking wind upon your sodden bonce. An hour later and my hair is finally just damp, rather than saturated. So I set off, in the rain to go and get the shopping in. It's not till I get out of the car and walk across the puddly car park that I discover there's a hole in my shoe and now my feet are wet. That's just fabulous.

After lugging the shopping into the house by myself and putting it away it's time to go to college. I've a sneaking suspicion that I've gone in entirely the wrong direction with my essay so I collar my tutor before class and get him to have a look through what I've done. Sometimes being right is not a good thing.

We get an early dart from college and escape nearly an hour earlier than usual, hurrah! However the laws of the universe must be balanced and for my good fortune, there must also be some bad fortune. In this case mine, again. I open the front door to be greeting by the most eye watery appalling stink. Oh happy days, the dog has crapped all over the living room floor and the whole house now smells worse than Satan's underpants. So I'm sitting in the living room, eating my microwave dinner and drinking my glass of wine in my reeking house, looking at the stains on the living room carpet and wondering when the comet is going to crash into the house or the juggernaut flatten to my car to finish off this marvellous day in the manner it began, continued and will inevitably end. It's just another day in the Vicola House of Shit. Literally. Sigh.

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7 Responses

  1. At least you can laugh about it. Well, in fifty years or so…

  2. To stay in the same vein … what a shitty day you had! I hope the wine helped …. though I suspect I would need more than a glass!

  3. [esto es genial]

  4. That is some day you had there!!! I hate days like that where you know from the minute you get up that the trajectory of your day will only go one way and that's downwards!!

  5. I would have gone to the Chinese except that thanks to a hen weekend and a wedding in close proximity I am completely broke. If I don't end up foraging in bins for food by payday it'll be a miracle. Hapily the dog has not repeated the turd episode and once the carpet has been shampooed I will perhaps see the funny side of it. Unlucky about the dog pee thing, that stuff really whiffs.

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