On hold music….

Sometimes I think companies don’t really give enough thought to what they put on their phonelines as on hold music.

I’m currently on the phone to Amazon to find out where the CD I ordered back in the middle of November has got to and I’ve been on hold for 12 minutes, listening to THE most annoying tinkly piano music I’ve ever encountered. In terms of sheer awfulness it even beats the strident Coldplay that I got on hold to a delivery company last week. When I started on hold I was mildly grumpy, after 12 minutes of auditory torture I am spitting feathers and wanting to reach down the phone to pull someone’s head off.

Might be a good time to ring Panasonic back then. Someone called ‘Geri’ is now looking into where the fuck the remote control I ordered with next day delivery last Thursday has got to. Apparently it’s ‘a bit of a mystery really’. Really? Well I can’t say I give a shit to be honest, as long as someone refunds me my £11.50 next day delivery charge and gives me a cast iron guarantee that the thing will be with me today. DHL may be showing a note on their delivery site saying that ‘adverse weather has delayed some deliveries’ but it’s been thawing out since Thursday, there’s not a scrap of ice anywhere and had I got on a horse carrying said remote control and set off from Panasonic’s headquarters I’d have arrived by now, I refuse to believe that a guy in van travelling along perfectly clear motorways cannot accomplish the same thing. ‘Geri’ has precisely 22 minutes to ring me back and tell me what’s going on before I phone back and start getting pissy. Ordering deliveries around christmas in this country is a frigging nightmare. I don’t see why they can’t get it right and aniticipate the demand, the bloody festival is annual, it’s not like they couldn’t see it coming. Sigh….


15 Responses

  1. That’s shocking.

    The company I work for is…involved…with the Olympic Games in London 2012. We have an office down there for ticketing. I’ve done the on hold music for them – well, when I say I’ve done it I don’t mean I wrote or recorded it, I merely put it on their phone system and my god; I had to listen to it before I processed it to their phone system and it’s shocking. I rang the guy to ask if he was SURE he wanted me to put it on there. It’s a cross between a bad eurovision entry (see UK, since the contest started) and a porn line.

    I do feel sorry for you and no consolation I know, but we use DHL as our courier of choice in the UK and the rest of the world. In the whole debacle of iced up roads, I had one parcel delayed by a HUGE 1 day. Wonder if you’re being lied to….I do hope not, I’ve read you ranting on here.

    • ARGGGH!! Have just rung back AGAIN to be informed that they’re still trying to track it from the warehouse. Have now shouted at a man called Mark that I have to be on site in half an hour and require and answer and a refund by then. He swears he’ll ring me back in 5 or ten minutes. If he doesn’t, they will be getting another call from me and this time, I will really let loose with both barrels. How can a major company be this much of a fuck up on the customer services front and not go bankrupt in a competitive market? It is beyond me and it’s really grinding my gears badly.

  2. oh no – that’s such a pain! – i’ve only had one thing from Amazon go astray since 1998, when i started ordering from them when we were living in Seattle – and that was from Amazon Marketplace

    i hope yours get your refund all sorted – enough to deal with this time of the year!

    i ordered a bunch of stuff to my parents (including the latest season of Doctor Who – yay!) several weeks ago – so i’m holding my breath that they’re there by the time we get back!

    • You’ll probably be ok Paikea, we’re still suffering massive delivery backlogs over here from the bad weather when the roads and railtracks got blocked. And since it’s due to hit again on Thursday I can’t see things easing up any until the new year. Such is life I suppose….

      • yikes!! – well, currently, i’m loving being in Northern Hemisphere winter – i may regret those sentiments the second our flights get screwed up and our bags go awry (i’m in the school of thought that says if i actually articulate a thought, it’ll never happen – i know, SO rational – lol!)

  3. ‘a bit of a mystery’? You need a bazooka ….

    • For once, words failed me. It’s probably just as well because had the words that sprang to mind once I’d recovered my wits emerged during the phone call I’d almost certainly have been barred from Panasonic’s customer care line.

  4. It seems like no one does what they say they are going to do anymore and companies are so big that there is no way to truly hold them accountable. It’s a travesty! I don’t blame you for being upset!

  5. I really freaking hate some companies and their shitty attempts at customer service. It always baffles me, too, that they (companies and delivery services) can be so unprepared for something that happens every damn year.

    • It’s bloody ridiculous isn’t it? And this year in the UK, that unheard of festival Christmas has been combined with…shock and horror…snow and ice. Absolute chaos. How Russia, Siberia, Canada and large tracts of the US manage to get by is beyond me, 2 foot of snow over here and they’re heralding the end of the Gulf Stream, the arrival of the 4 horsemen and the start of Armageddon.

  6. Yes, the hold music can be horrific and way toooo loud. my favorite hold experience was when someone gave me the number for the M&M’s company. On the recording I got, there were two M&M’s having a conversation. It made me laugh so hard!!

    Can you not follow your Amazon orders online? I have an account so I can get on and see exactly where my packages are and if they have been shipped. If you did not before, perhaps consider opening an account so that you won’t have to call them and listen to horrible music.

    I hope the remote gets there ASAP!

    • I can to an extent follow it through my account but unless it was posted through a courier service I can only see when it was sent. My parcel was sent from outside Glasgow which has been pretty much at a standstill when it snowed, having received a few feet and the UK being utterly unprepared for it. As per usual. The nice chap said that if it hadn’t come by Friday they’d send out another one which is lovely of them but won’t help as Glasgow is due to get belted with another coating of snow on Thursday and a lot of courier and delivery companies are refusing to take orders for Scotland until further notice. Such is life at this time of year.

      Like the sound of the M&M on hold thing, that sounds like a great idea.

  7. I didn’t realise there was a phone number for Amazon – it must be well hidden. Washingontonians seem to freak out if we get more than 3 inches of snow – starting with people totally forgetting how to drive.

  8. Relax everybody, there is no need to angst any more about your deliveries. According to various newspapers, online companies are cancelling orders on the grounds they know they will not be able to fulfil them because of the weather.

    Remarkable prescience, don’t you think?

    Not to say, craven capitulation…oh, sorry, I did say it.

    Why does nothing work in this fucking country any more?

  9. A lot of companies here have a local radio station as their hold music. Can be good and can be bad.

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