Yesterday evening I was loading up the dishwasher and in it, I put an oil bottle that needed cleaning out. I put the dishwasher on, wandered off and started making the tea. About 45 minutes later I realised that I needed the sieve, which was in the dishwasher, and so I did what I would normally do, I opened the dishwasher door to get the item required. This was where things went a bit wrong.

See, what I’d forgotten was that there was about a quarter of an inch of washing up liquid in the bottom of the oil bottle. And my, can a quarter of an inch of washing up bubbles foam up a long way. As I opened the dishwasher door, I was greeted by a tidal wave of bubbles and water that cascaded merrily down my legs and over my feet, flooding the kitchen. The dog screeched and legged it, big brave guard dog that he is. So I did what any sensible person would do – shut the door and pretended nothing was wrong. Because naturally if you ignore the fact that you’re now making chilli knee deep in foam, everything is fine, right? Of course it is.

Well at least it was until all the lights went out because the bubbles reached whatever sensor lives in the interior of the dishwasher and tells it that it’s full of something that shouldn’t be there, causing it to trip out and blow the fuses. So now I’m knee deep in bubbles, it’s pitch black and the burglar alarm is going off because that’s what it does if the mains power goes off. Bloody brilliant. I feel my way into the downstairs loo, where the fusebox is and push the switch back up. Lights, lovely. I get halfway back to the kitchen – click, darkness, burglar alarm. Fuse gone again. So I feel my way back into kitchen, tripping over the dog on the way in (note to self, next time get light coloured dog which a) shows up better in the dark and b) has hairs that don’t look like big spiders when they blow across the tiles) to switch everything off at the mains. Then I go flick the fuse again.

Carefully opening the dishwasher door a tiny crack to see what’s going on in there, I’m surprised to notice that all you can see is bubbles, no shelves, no stuff, just bubbles, covering everything and filling the machine. Perhaps I should write to Morrisons and let them know the awesome foaming power of their own brand washing up liquid, it’s quite remarkable. I decide that the best thing to do will be to leave the machine overnight for the bubbles to die down then let it finish its cycle and hope it doesn’t blow up anything else in the meantime. It’s as I’m trying to mop up the kitchen carnage that Mr V comes home, looks at the kitchen floor, looks at the dog under the coffee table, looks in the dishwasher and wanders off muttering about halfwits attempting to operate machinery.

And this is why you shouldn’t put washing up liquid in the dishwasher.

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5 Responses

  1. It’s an “I Love Lucy” episode!

    But just think of how clean the floor is.

  2. Always worth saving a Vicola blog till I have time to enjoy.

    Can I post a link to this entry on FB? I’m intending to highlight the Best Blog entries I see this year and I’d like to share another funny read in the Vicola style.

    No pressure and a refusal will not offend.

    • Hi Peter, glad to know that at least other people are getting enjoyment out of my total failure! Feel free to post it there, that’s fine by me.

  3. 1) fabric softener kills bubbles within seconds
    2) get your burglar alarm serviced or, at least, get Mr V to fit a new backup battery. It’s in the main box that has the keypad on it. Take it out & go to an alarm place for a new one.
    It’ll stop the bloody thing going off every time there’s a power cut or will set it off if some lowlife interferes with it.

    We got burgled in Sept. Trust me, its not nice, specially when you thought the alarm was OK so never got it checked.

  4. What a great post – your misadventure thoroughly cheered me up.

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