Getting cross on email.

Finally I have discovered the secret to getting people to leave you the fuck alone and stop pestering you with their incessant demands. Get cross on email.

From: Subcontractor bint                  Sent: 20 June 2012 14:15
To: Some People                                      Subject: HSEQ Issues

Afternoon All,

Further to our meeting last Tuesday (apologies for the delay), please find attached the list of subcontractors I am going to make non payable on the system due to not receiving a HSEQ.

The first Tab details the “outstanding issues” and I have added a notes column of my own, providing feedback on what action I am going to take.

The rows highlighted in grey are new subcontractors that weren’t on the gap analysis originally.

The second tab is the overall summery for H&S and I have also included my actions on this page.

If you do have copies of HSEQ’s for the subcontractors in the first tab, please can you forward over to Vicky or myself ASAP so we can update the system and make them payable again?

I have included the “contract” column so you can see which contracts these subbies are assigned to, if you feel they are no longer working on your contract, can you advise so we can remove them from the list?

Hope the table is pretty self explanatory, however if you have any queries please do not hesitate to contact me.

Kind Regards


 Subcontractor bint.

From: Commercial Manager                 Sent: 20 June 2012 14:19
To: Framework Manager; Vicola
Subject: FW: HSEQ Issues

Framework Manager / Vicola

Not checked yet, but from those I saw at the meeting there are some that we need

Commercial Manager

From: Vicola               Sent: 20 June 2012 14:18
To: Commercial Manager; Framework manager
Subject: RE: HSEQ Issues


I am well aware that we are getting behind in terms of HSEQ assessments on subcontractors but I will be honest here. I have not got the time to do everything that is currently being asked of me. I cannot deal with subcontractors, Enterprise incident investigations, all the extra stuff that Enterprise have piled on to the department, asbestos management plan for the yard, outstanding audit actions, a raft of upcoming HSEQ audits on every NW site from New Company and getting everything out to site and done for the client’s Olympic torch initiative as well as getting out on site to try and make sure we don’t have any more major catastrophes. There aren’t enough hours in the day to currently do everything that I am being expected to do. Either I am going to have to be given more assistance to do everything that is required or everyone is going to have to lower their expectations of what I can achieve as my hours and my expected output aren’t currently compatible. Sorry to go off on one but I’m getting grief from all directions here and I can’t make everyone happy at the moment.



Now they are staying the hell out of my way and not even making eye contact, let alone sending me emails about stupid subcontractor evaluations. Thank fuck for that. Now perhaps I can get some bloody work done.


3 Responses

  1. You’re my hero.

  2. Well done Vic. I am currently biting my tongue, trying very hard to avoid pointing out to my CEO the irony of organising a brainstorming session on fundraising for our Trustees – the cost of which is currently running at c£1500. It’s not the room hire that’s costing, it’s the ‘ooh we’ll need to have a proper meal after all this work’. Which is going to cost about £50 a head. Plus wine. ‘Oh, and we’ll need top-ups of tea, coffee and biscuits throughout. Another £15 a head (it’s a 3 hour session, god forbid they should starve). They’re deciding whether or not and, if yes, how we should be fundraising. Individual donations to this charity are usually in the region of £10. Gnnnnnrrrrgh.

    • Jesus, sometimes it’s amazing the irony bypass that senior execs have had. I love that they have to have a fifty quid dinner after doing some work whereas the rest of us have a butty at our desk. My how tough their little lives must be.

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